Not sure about Tristan

This morning Tristan woke up early with a fever and I figured it was just from his shot and then seemed to be doing better after the fever went down. We went to mcdonalds and he wouldn't eat or really play and now his fever is back. Really hope it is just from the shot but can a shot do that? I am supposed to be doing wiggles tomorrw and don't want to ask julliana to miss already when I just started working with her last week. Jackie called today and said that Bob has a spot on his pacreas and they think it might be cancer. She is trying not to be worried but i could still tell that she was. I really hope it turns out to be nothing don't know what we would do without bob around. Tristans soccor coach wanted to give him a trophy and i am just feeling like everyone wants money from us lately and out the window goes my trailer money. Don't want to be the grouchy mom i told her we wouldn't be making it too the party and that we didn't need a trophy hopefully she doesn't think i am crazy or something Just so tired of putting out money for everything. I have got to stop spending and it just doesn't seem to be working no matter how hard i try : ) Worked on my bible study today and really trying to follow the holy spirits leading in my life. I never realized how involved the holy spirit was in the my life. So nice to know i am never alone or without the strenght to do the things i need to do. I am so thankful for edith we went to mcdonalds today to let the boys play and I think ethan and grant will be good friends. Hopefully we can make some other friends when we finally make it to church there. I am really excited about everyone comming this weekend hopefully the weather will stay nice so we can go get pumpkins I love getting pumpkins. Only 4:30 and i am ready for bryan to be home : ) ethan is playing the wii think i need to set a time limit on it but what else is there to do in the winter when it is raining. Tristan is watching a movie in his room.

Going to give this a try

Been thinking about blogging for a while so now I am going to give this a try. Going to keep it private for a while so I can figure this out : ) so here is today postingI am loving the weather today it finally feels like fall even though I know soon I will be wishing for he sun. Enjoying a few precious minutes of quiet time while the kids are resting. Not sleeping for sure but at least quiet and resting. They are redoing our sewer lines in the street in front of us and that noise makes it hard to rest. Tristan got a shot today it is so hard once they are old enough to know that it is going to hurt and you still have to hold them down so they can get it done. He was so proud of himself and said "I am BRAVE" he got a dinosaur ring and sister got a ball even though she was just moral suport. We went to bible study after that and I was really worried that Tristan wouldn't like it bc it is all little girls but he said he had a good time and wants to go back. Thank you lord I really needed something to be easy. I don't know if I still made the right decision to start going to this bible study and not the one on mondays but I am really trying to listen to gods voice wish he would speak louder : ) Praying this is a church that we can really get connected to.I am so thankful for Edith she has been such a blessing and literally a life saver Hopefully tomorrow we can get toghether for a playdate especially for ethan who could really use a friend. Maybe after praying for over 2 years God is finally going to answer my prayers for friends and a good church where we can get connected. I felt bad when I told Peggy I wasn't going to be comming to moms connection but i really needed to do something different and felt really on the outside of that group even though i have been goind longer than most everyone else. I quess God just didn't want me to make any real connection with anyone there. Thankful for Lisa though who says she still wants to get together and maybe I will start going to mops in sutherlin so then I can at least see them once a month. There were so many needs during prayer request time so many people hurting makes my small little world really not seem that bad. They talked about living in the spirit sure wish I could remember that I have the power of the spirit for everything and that i just need to rely on him to do it through me. I feel like satan has really gotton some footholds in my life and I really need to make sure I get him to let go.